


Defeated

by ThunderDownOnGreenside



Series: Decided [2]
Category: Free!
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Fix-It, Frottage, M/M, Relationship Problems, Sexual Content, Slash, Unresolved Sexual Tension, that actually really sums it up right there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-13
Updated: 2014-07-13
Packaged: 2018-02-08 17:59:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1950792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThunderDownOnGreenside/pseuds/ThunderDownOnGreenside
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As it turns out, it’s all the things that Rin is bad at that fix everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Defeated

**Author's Note:**

> This is the happy intermediate and direct sequel to Deconstructed that I've been promising for twenty-seven thousand years XD I still can't quite do the smut thing, but...I think I may be getting there? I hope you enjoy it! Many thanks to everyone who encouraged me to write a happy ending~
> 
> (There may be a third part in this series? A little bit of what happens after the happy ever after? Not totally sure, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed that things will work out!)

Rin Matsuoka is bad at a lot of things.

 

 

He’s bad at making friends and he’s even worse at keeping them. (The same rule applies to promises, especially important ones.) He’s bad at receiving criticism, constructive or otherwise, and it really doesn’t matter who offers him advice, he is _not_ going to take it. He can be pretty bad at being a team player and working with other people, despite the fact that his high school requires _roommates_ for underclassmen and he participates in a swim _team_. He can also be flat-out _terrible_ at being friendly with people who piss him off in even the slightest fashion, and unfortunately for Rin, his tolerance for stupidity is so low that it borderlines on unhealthy. He’s bad at saying goodbye. He’s bad at letting go of the past.

 

 

And he’s _really_ bad at breakups.

 

 

He knows better than anyone (and by anyone he means no one because only two people _actually_ know and _he's_ one of them) that what went down all those months ago was a fucking _disaster_ and not an actual relationship, but it had still hurt like a stab wound to the gut when it all fell apart and it’s not like Rin really has any experience with getting shanked by somebody _anyway_ , but that’s irrelevant to the point. The point being that Rin had gotten really comfortable in the whole five minutes that had transpired between them, and by the time his mind had fully realized just what the _fuck_ was up, his heart had already skipped a couple beats and had decided to go swinging off into the golden sunset.

 

 

Of course, Rin’s mind is a powerful thing, and he had run away as soon as he’d figured out all the shit he’d just gotten himself into. Unfortunately for him, there were many major flaws in this way of thinking, the primary one being that his heart is just about as strong as his mind, if not far more insistent.

 

 

The other major issue is that the root cause of all Rin’s confusion and pain and self-inflicted misery is not some airy-fairy. (Considering that he attends a closed-off academy high school, something like that would be hard to accomplish anyway.) No, it’s a very permanent human being with a fantastic smile and incredible skills and the most glorious eyes that Rin has ever seen.

 

 

Yeah, of all people that Rin had picked to screw up with, he’d picked his captain, Seijuurou-I-still-get- _really_ -upset-about-you-sometimes-Mikoshiba.

 

 

Honestly, it was pretty much all his fault, and Rin knew it. He’d been the one to run away and the captain wasn’t going to pressure him, didn’t want to. He was better than that, concerned and treading cautiously now and he knew Rin was an odd case. So, as bitter and as stilted as it was, it had ended.

 

 

But now there’s another type of ending. Seijuurou is graduating. And as stated before, Rin is bad at saying goodbye.

 

 

Which is how he finds himself here, shifting nervously from foot to foot in front of his captain’s door. He knows that his superior will be alone; as a third-year, bastard had been lucky enough to get a single, giving Seijuurou the dorm to himself for the entire year. Whether that will be his advantage right now, Rin can’t be sure, and thinking of all the worst-case scenarios is really getting to his head.

 

 

So he lifts a shaking hand to knock on the barrier between them, cluttered mind composing some weird, extended metaphor about how this door symbolizes the rift between them and that by approaching it he’s just that many steps closer to potentially crossing it – when the door suddenly opens and Rin finds himself face-to-face with the very person he had been intending to see but suddenly doesn’t want to anymore. The words die in his throat, his expression sours, and he lets out a strangled little noise – which was probably supposed to mean “never mind” – before he whips around and bolts for his own dorm.

 

 

Well, that’s what he would’ve done if his taller and much stronger captain hadn’t grabbed him by the arm and prevented him from high-tailing it out of there, that is.

 

 

“Matsuoka?” Oh, so they’re back to last name terms now. He really should’ve known, all things considered, although the fact that Seijuurou hasn’t thrown him away already completely has to count for something. Rin tugs at his arm with a scowl and his captain releases him, looking rather perplexed.

 

 

“Do you need something?”

 

 

“Not anymore,” he mutters, but lingers anyway. He can’t help it; Seijuurou has always had a center of gravity that causes others to be drawn to him, and no matter how hard he had fought at the time – or is still fighting – Rin can’t get away from it.

 

 

His captain shifts, sensing the impending awkward silence and steps back, gesturing into his room.

 

 

“You uh...you wanna come in?” Rin glares at him, unsettled by the familiarity in the movement – not to mention the last time they had been in this position, they had been laughing alongside each other, completely unaware of what was to come – and pushes past him, head down, snarl set firmly on his face.

 

 

“Five minutes.” He mutters, and his captain sighs.

 

 

He hears Seijuurou close the door behind him and takes a deep breath, mentally steeling himself for the impending conflict. He knows that if he does this even slightly wrong it’ll get ugly really fast and the last thing that he wants right now is to get caught up in yet another petty spitfight with someone that he really doesn’t want to be fighting with. (The other was Nitori, but the only real problem with that is that the kid cries really loudly and that does _not_ present optimal studying conditions.) So he has to do this absolutely perfectly, no errors allowed. _This means too much, so don’t fuck it up_.

 

 

“So, you, uh-!”

 

 

Rin whirls around as his captain starts to speak, surprising the older male and rendering his awkward attempts at speech completely mute with a single, well-placed glare.

 

 

“Where are you going?”

 

 

“Huh?” Seijuurou looks confused all over again, expressive eyebrows furrowing and his mouth opening slightly in befuddlement. “What do you mean?”

 

 

“When you leave. After you graduate.” Rin elaborates tersely, and he feels a little alarmed when he notices his captain stiffening slightly at the nature of the question.

 

 

“Oh, is that all?” Slight venom begins to color Seijuurou’s previously neutral tone. “Why, you want me as far away as possible?”

 

 

_Shit._

 

 

“That’s not what I meant.” Rin backtracks to contrite so quickly that he almost gets attitude whiplash, but it seems to placate his captain, if only for a moment.

 

 

“Then what exactly did you mean?” The older male is back to being cautiously unaffected, feigning nonchalance in place of his usual range of bright and creative emotions, and Rin decides to push the envelope a little farther, if not with more prudence this time.

 

 

“I meant – well.”

 

 

So, Rin Matsuoka is bad at a lot of things. He’s bad at keeping a cool head under pressure, at avoiding suspicions and maintaining civility for extended periods of time. He’s pretty bad about conveying his emotions through any other way than crying (or screaming, alternatively) and he tends to have a hard time getting to the truth of the matter, whatever it may be. He’s awful at reacting properly to his feelings, and it really shows. He’s bad at remaining calm. He’s bad at communicating clearly.

 

 

And he’s really bad at salvaging things, apparently.

 

 

“You’ve got to be straightforward with me.” Seijuurou insists, slightly tetchy, crossing his arms and trying to keep the frustration off of his face. “You know that’s what messed things up that night, right?”

 

 

“Excuse me?” Rin can’t believe what he’s hearing. “Are you trying to insinuate that this is my fault?”

 

 

“Honestly, Matsuoka? What the _fuck_ even gave you that idea?”

 

 

“I left because I thought that’s what you would have wanted!” the younger man’s voice is getting louder now as his hurt starts to show through. “Face it Seijuurou, you don’t like me like that! Why are you even playing this game?”

 

 

“Playing what game? I’m not playing anything!” Seijuurou is angry now too, taking a threatening step forward. “I mean, jeez Rin! What the hell was I supposed to do when you ran off like that?”

 

 

“I don’t know, chase after me? I didn’t want to wait around for the rejection!” Rin pauses, glares, and then throws his arms in the air. “And seriously, how the fuck would it have even worked, anyway?”

 

 

“Maybe we could have talked it out if you hadn’t taken off like that! Dammit Rin, you can’t just run away from all your problems!” The taller moves closer again, the distance between them shortening. “I’m telling you, that’s what messes things up!”

 

 

“Maybe I didn’t want to go!” Rin yells, surging forward so that his face is only inches from his captain’s. “Maybe I wanted to stay with you!”

 

 

“Yeah? Well, maybe I wanted you to stay with me too!” Seijuurou roars back, grabbing Rin’s smaller shoulders in an effort to fully communicate before noticing the suddenly blank look on the other’s face. There’s a pause, a quick breath between them, and something in the younger male’s expression breaks a little even as Seijuurou watches. Inwardly, he curses himself for bringing it this far.

 

 

“Damn it all to hell,” he hisses, and crushes his mouth against Rin’s.

 

 

Initially, he gets no response, and his teammate practically hangs there in his grasp, too stunned to move or react or even breathe and the captain almost gives up right there. Then it’s like a switch has flipped and Seijuurou finds himself stumbling back as Rin launches himself forward, throwing his arms around the taller male’s neck and kissing him in return with all he has. It’s desperate, it’s messy, and it definitely isn’t what either of them expected from this encounter, but honestly, neither of them really care.

 

 

“Wh-why?” Rin demands breathlessly when he pulls back, lips swollen and eyes accusing. “I don’t-!”

 

 

“ _Because_ , Goddammit.” Seijuurou cuts himself to kiss his teammate again. “I fucking like you, okay? Dammit Rin, how much will it take for you to see that?”

 

 

The unwelcome tears welling up in the corners of Rin’s eyes tell him all he needs to know.

 

 

“Hey, hey, hey. Look at me.” He soothes, cupping the younger’s face in his hands. “I get it. I’m sorry that I didn’t make it clear, I just – I didn’t think that you were the same as me.”

 

 

“I wished that I wasn’t.” Rin mutters bitterly, refusing to meet his captain’s earnest eyes. Seijuurou just shakes his head, tucking a finger and thumb around his teammate’s chin and tilting his face up.

 

 

“You don’t have to anymore.” He says gently, and kisses him again.

 

 

Rin melts into it, that familiar rush beginning to stir in his chest and he gives into it, gasping slightly into the kiss when Seijuurou tugs lightly on his hair. His head tips back when his captain starts pressing kisses to his jawline, shuddering slightly when he feels Seijuurou’s lips at his throat. Back arched, arms wrapped around the third-year’s shoulders, he practically hovers there, still a little shocked but no less willing. Seijuurou has one arm around his waist, one hand in his hair, his mouth on Rin’s again and neither of them can shake the instinctual understanding that this is not the same as last time. Something feels dissimilar already. This time, things will be different.

 

 

A high-pitched whine breaks out of one of them – there’s no way to tell exactly who made the sound, only that it triggers the feelings lingering just beneath the surface – and something in them just _snaps_.

 

 

This time, things will be different.

 

 

Rin’s back hits the mattress and he whimpers softly into his captain’s mouth, trembling like a leaf at the feeling of his burning touches. It’s almost too good to be true, the fact that this is happening again, the one thing that he’s been yearning so intensely for over the past few months. The other seems to be pretty desperate for it too with the way that he kisses him so fervently and the faster-paced nature of his movements. Seijuurou has already settled over his hips, mouth pressing more insistently against Rin’s, one arm bending at the elbow near the smaller male’s head to brace himself up above him while the other follows a more downward angle. Fingertips trace along the planes of his chest through his thin cotton shirt before resting against his hip, thumb stroking slowly against the bone. The touch is electric and Rin is breathless, helpless, already wrapped up into this so tightly and it has hardly even been five minutes yet. Dimly, he thinks these things to himself as Seijuurou slides his shirt up over his head, and even as Rin moves forward to kiss along the elder’s collarbone, all he can consider is that if this ends badly again he won’t be able to handle it.

 

 

“Stop,” he gasps, and the low groan that vibrates in Seijuurou’s throat in response is almost enough to make him take it back.

 

 

“What is it?” the question is husky, hanging in the minimal air between their bodies, and Rin swallows.

 

 

“This has to work out.”

 

 

“You think it won’t?”

 

 

 _It never does,_ Rin wants to say, but stops himself somehow.

 

 

“I...I’m scared.”

 

 

Seijuurou sits back and quirks an eyebrow but doesn’t say anything. Rin feels the need to be defensive.

 

 

“It’s not like I don’t trust you or anything! I just...I can’t deal with this again if something happens. We have to...we have to get this right.”

 

 

There’s a pause in the stifling heat of the room and Rin ducks his head, feeling his nerve slipping even as his captain shifts to a more comfortable position, still hovering over the younger man’s body but with a little less strain. The silence stretches, elongates – Rin swallows again but still can’t speak. Eventually, though –

 

 

“Rin. Look at me.” Fingers tuck under his chin and lift his face up only for Seijuurou to kiss him again, mouth soft and touch gentle.

 

 

“ _Mmph_ – Seijuurou, what?”

 

 

“We will get this right.” His captain says, voice low, gaze burning into Rin’s own. “I swear it. It’s not going to be like _last_ time. It’s going to be like _this_ time.”

 

 

“...” Rin blinks, a little startled by the elder’s intensity. “And what does... _this_ time entail?”

 

 

“Well.” Seijuurou smirks a little, hands moving to settle along the low waistband of Rin’s sweatpants, meeting the younger man’s eyes in a challenging fashion. “This time we’re going to do this the right way. No pretending.” Rin hisses out a breath when Seijuurou nuzzles his throat. “No holding back.” The younger man groans softly when his captain slides the cotton material down over his hips, shifting to get the pants all the way off. “No running. I approve of the commando thing, by the way.” Blushing, Rin looks away even as he squirms slightly, watching out of the corner of his eye as Seijuurou discards the rest of his own clothes. “No regrets.”

 

 

The younger man huffs out a breath as he follows his captain’s lead, twisting underneath him and pulling his shirt up over his head, tossing it somewhere over Seijuurou’s shoulder even as the third-year gazes down at him. Hooking an arm around his captain’s neck, Rin yanks him down so that their faces are only inches apart.

 

 

“No regrets, hm?” he half-pants, half-growls, and Seijuurou’s eyes widen slightly at the tone. “I can manage that, I suppose, but you have to give it to me so fucking good that I’m screaming by the end of it, you hear?”

 

 

The captain’s mouth falls open in shock and for a moment, he can’t even form words – then he bursts out laughing, shoulders shaking with mirth and relief.

 

 

“Oh, Rin.” He manages through a wide grin, shaking his head fondly. “What am I going to do with you?”

 

 

The younger man frowns, his eyebrow twitching slightly in pent-up frustration.

 

 

“You could start by moving, you know, otherwise I’ll have to flip you over and do it myself.” Rin threatens, but whatever else he was going to say dies in his throat when Seijuurou rocks his hips a little, positioning a thigh between Rin’s legs after testing the waters.

 

 

“No need to be rude,” he murmurs, and the other’s huff cuts off with a gasp as the older male shifts again. “I’ve wanted this for too long to wait around much more now.”

 

 

The movements start out small, more like careful rolling actions to find the best angle, find the place that allows for the most power and the most motion. Rin catches his breath on a small, half-formed cry when his captain moves a certain way and Seijuurou stops. Gives him a glance from the corner of burning, golden eyes. Leans in and kisses him again, long and slow, movements stalling almost completely. Pulls away. Rolls his hips down _hard_.

 

 

Rin throws his head back, crying out for real this time, fingers tangling in his captain’s hair as they push against each other. It’s stronger than last time, deeper and headier and so much more intimate, and Rin arches at the degree of overstimulation. Seijuurou feels it too, the way that his teammate’s body shudders at every form of contact, the way he’s laid himself completely bare before him. This is necessary. This is important. And he’s not going to let it fuck itself up this time.

 

 

Seijuurou finds the smaller male’s bruised mouth again, practically rendering him senseless as he couples the action with another slow roll of his hips and drawing a strangled, breathy moan out of Rin that almost drives the older insane. They’re clinging to each other, the elder’s body pinning the younger male’s down and Rin’s legs braced on either side of Seijuurou’s waist, rocking into every thrust of his hips, every stroke of his hand.

 

 

“S-Seijuurou...” It’s a quiet sound, an exhale barely heard over the sound of his own heavy breathing, but it gets the message across well enough.

 

 

“Rin,” Seijuurou gasps, eyes shut as he presses their sweaty foreheads together. “Rin...Rin...ah...”

 

 

“I want - !”

 

 

Rin starts to speak just as his captain drives his hips down hard, leaving the words to cut off into a loud cry that shakes at the end, one that Seijuurou echoes low in his throat.

 

 

“I can’t hang on.” Rin is panting, hair flung across his face and bangs sticky with sweat. Tiny whimpers are torn from his throat with every movement and his body arches underneath his captain’s as he gets closer to the breaking point. There’s just so many things happening all at once, Seijuurou’s lips at his throat, the crushing, _burning_ roll of his hips, the touch of his hand between his legs, the deep groans and muffled cries of pleasure that he lets out when Rin moves with him, it’s too much, it’s all too much, and he’s going to –

 

 

“Sei-!”

 

 

Seijuurou feels Rin’s teeth sink into skin somewhere along the line of his neck and shoulder as he comes, clinging to him like he did before, overwhelmed once again and always trying not to fall and like last time, his captain is there for him, holding on just as tightly, only this time he’s never letting go. He follows soon after, the arch of Rin’s body against his own tearing a cry from his throat and dragging him into completion alongside his teammate, chest heaving and body shaking with the force of it.

 

 

When Seijuurou is conscious of himself again, the first thing he feels is Rin’s hands resting lightly on his back, fingers tracing little figures and patterns here and there with no real intent. The younger man’s breathing has slowed by now – Seijuurou can feel his chest rising and falling against his own – and he seems calm enough, at least.

 

 

The captain groans a little as he props himself up on his elbows, stretching his back before settling still, back to hovering over his teammate as he tries to find something good to say. Another moment of silence passes in which all they do is stare at each other, one trying to catch their breath, the other trying to keep breathing, even with so many feelings seemingly constricting their lungs.

 

 

“Stay with me.” Seijuurou murmurs, resting his forehead against Rin’s. “Please.”

 

 

His teammate looks almost dazed as he gazes up at him, eyes a more subdued shade but there’s a smile flickering at the corners of his mouth. Seijuurou feels a hand run through his hair, unsticking some of the sweatier strands from the back of his neck, and finds that his mouth is twitching too.

 

 

“Of course.” Rin says softly, and his captain kisses him once more.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

They make it publicly official not even three days later, seeing as Rin has come to him to talk every night since that first time and they both get utterly distracted by each other. Repeatedly. And everybody knows it.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Seijuurou graduates not too soon after, bestowing the power of the captain onto Rin with all the mixed solemnity of a man passing on his life’s work, and in a sense, he is. Rin takes the changeover with grace and a quiet understanding, knowing that he’ll get to talk it over with Seijuurou later.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Rin follows Seijuurou to his chosen university when he graduates a year later, despite having said that he’ll go wherever is best. Managing a long-distance relationship for all of that time hadn’t exactly been the easiest thing, but then again, there has never really been anyone else for them.

 

 

It’s been decided, it seems, by a warmer kind of fate.

 


End file.
